Cabbages, get your lovely fresh cabbages!

The Labour Party may be “under new management” but two of the previous landlords seem oblivious to the unspoken rule that the expectation of former party leaders is that they should fade into the woodwork.

Rent-a-gob Tony Blair seems eager to pass opinion on anything and everything lately, as if anyone gives a rat’s ass about what he thinks, and now Jeremy Corbyn – who you will remember lost the election spectacularly yet somehow thinks he still won the argument – has emerged from his allotment shed to express his “disappointment” over his successor’s decision to compensate whistleblowers who contributed to a July 2019 Panorama investigation on anti-semitism within the party.

Seven former Labour employees had sued the party after it issued a press release at the time describing them as having “personal and political axes to grind”.

Labour has also apologised to journalist John Ware, who presented the programme, and agreed to pay damages after accusing him of “deliberate and malicious misrepresentations designed to mislead the public”.

Corbyn’s assertion that Sir Kier Starmer’s move this week was “a political decision, not a legal one” has opened up yet another can or worms which, rather than beginning to rehabilitate Labour’s damaged reputation, threatens to perpetuate an image which has alienated millions and left the country without a viable opposition.

While I have on many occasions voiced my distrust of all party politics, there must be an opposition to whichever government is in power. The Lib Dems are a joke and the Labour Party has enough problems with its showing in the last general election without the anti-semitism outrage (and it is an outrage) rearing its ugly head again.

Corbynistas have even set up a crowdfunding campaign in case Mr Ware now decides to sue their glorious ex leader for defamation, which looks entirely possible as the accusations that were levelled against him go straight to the principles of our profession and were more worthy of the Trump administration’s cries of “fake news” than a Labour Party leader who is supposed to epitomise the term “for the people”.

More than £200,000 has already been raised apparently.

What people choose to do with their hard earned cash is up to them, but I can think of far more deserving recipients than someone who should be spending his dotage growing cabbages and carrots.

Maybe the Jezza fan club should take a leaf out of Colonel Sir Tom’s book.

Summer madness

To all the people who couldn’t wait to go on holiday to Spain as soon as lockdown restrictions were relaxed, I hope it was worth it. I think I saw two of you walking into the Co-op without masks on at the weekend.

After a spike in cases on the Costas raised fears of a second wave of coronavirus in Espagna, anyone returning to the UK from their holiday in the sun will now be expected to isolate for 14 days.

And there lies the problem. Because if they were stupid or selfish enough to go in the first place, they are most certainly not going to lock themselves away for another fortnight – no matter how much they deserve it – and enforcing such a thing will be impossible when you’re dealing with people who have absolutely no consideration for others.

So an increase in COVID-19 cases here is, I believe, inevitable.

But should the worst happen, it won’t be their fault, of course. Oh no, it will be the government’s, or Spain’s… Trump… Maradona… Piers Morgan… Kanye… anyone but them.

Hold on tight folks, it looks like we’re in for another bumpy ride.

Stupid TV quiz answer of the week

Tipping Point – of course.

Q: Hippology is the study of which domestic animal?

A: Hippos?


Mick Ferris

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