Diving in at the shallow end

Women’s sport finds itself in a bit of a dilemma over transexual competitors. Swimming’s governing body, FINA voted last week to ban trans athletes who have gone through any part of male puberty from competing in female competition.

And while that is sure to cause controversy, and possibly even a legal test case at some point down the line as athletics already looks likely to follow suit, it’s an impossible situation to resolve to everyone’s satisfaction within the present classification structure.

There will almost certainly need to be some new open-style category in addition to the standard men’s and women’s competitions.

Inclusiveness has to be the ultimate aim in all things, but a line of competitors where one has an unfair physical advantage is the opposite of inclusive anyway.

The100m freestyle for people who identify as women is never going to float I’m afraid. It’s not a level field (or pool) and that is essential in individual competitive sport.

There will always be athletes who rise to the top, but that level of performance has to be on merit alone. Exploiting chromosomes is cheating just as much as someone pumped up with performance enhancing drugs.

As harsh as that may seem to some who have already gone through one massive struggle, with gender increasingly being treated as something that can be changed like an old pair of pants, simple biology has to hold sway with XX or XY being the deciding factor on fairness.


Dame Kelly Holmes is the latest celeb of sorts to labour under the illusion that the minutiae of their life is of any interest to the rest of us.

War is raging in Ukraine, schoolkids are being shot in the US while at home we’re dealing with a horrendous cost of living crisis and a Home Secretary who is part wicked pantomime queen, part Terminator (the one from Judgement Day who pretends to be a set of floor tiles), but hold the front page because someone who won a couple of middle distance gold medals 18 years ago is “excited” to reveal to the world the bleedin’ obvious about her sexuality.

The media enables this egotistical crap with the inevitable fawning Phil and Holly interview and tabloids referring to her as “brave” (kids with cancer, that’s brave, not offering up unsolicited information about your sex life to anyone prepared to listen).

It’s not news, it’s not interesting, it’s certainly not a shock, it’s no one’s business but hers and, as I have said many times in previous columns when these completely unnecessary cries for unjustified attention occur, I DON’T CARE!! I really don’t give a tinker’s cuss, as the Python architect sketch goes.

And to think anyone else should is just a conceit.

Fair enough luv, each to their own, happy for you and all that, but for goodness sake get over yourself.


Talk of tagging asylum seekers now? What on earth are we turning into? As if our very own version of Rosa Klebb (look it up kids) trying to force desperate people onto a plane to Rwanda isn’t bad enough, she’s now aiming on fitting them with a digital ball and chain.

What’s next, hobbling? Or maybe Priti Patel aims on turning the Isle of Wight into an offshore detention centre.

Shame on us if we allow this to happen.

Quote of the week:

Another absolute gem from spiritualist medium of the moment Chris Fleming on Reality TV’s Spooked Scotland.

“The imps are telling me to f*** off.”

No Chris, I think that was Gail Porter.

Stupid TV quiz answer of the week:

Q: Who is the daughter of your aunt?

A: Sister (In your family maybe mate!)


Edward Case