In space no one can hear you groan

Moonfall (12A, 128 minutes)

Roland Emmerich is the daddy of disaster movies with a reputation for apocalyptic overkill and over the top on-screen excess. His earthquakes are the quakiest, his tidal waves the tsunamiest.

And in this case, his bombast the bombastiest because the premise – the moon leaves its orbit and falls towards the earth – is so ridiculous that one just has to marvel at the millions of dollars that have been thrown at a green screen.

But don’t think of that as a bad thing, because when it comes to armageddon I would take this excruciatingly awful gibberish over the self congratulatory ooh aren’t we clever faux satire of Don’t Look Up any day of the week.

Because for all it’s silliness – and it really is as daft as it gets without intending to be – Moonfall has an inexplicable charm in the same way that some of us can’t resist watching video clips of kids saying stupid things, people falling over, getting drenched or walking into a lamppost.

It’s not supposed to be funny but…

Patrick Wilson (soon to make his directorial debut with Insidious 5) plays a disgraced astronaut (called Brian of all things) wrongly blamed for the failure of a mission 10 years earlier, who conveniently becomes the planet’s best hope of survival when, along with former team mate turned NASA bigwig Halle Berry and conspiracy theorist/ bonkers scientist (Game of Thrones’ John Bradley) when they take a museum exhibit space shuttle back into the void in a race against time to confront (wait for it) an alien AI hidden deep inside the hollow moon.

Of all the stupid plot lines in this absurd end of the world tale, it’s ironic that the hollow moon theory is something that gained some traction amongst scientists 50 years ago when Apollo 12 deliberately crashed the ascent stage of its lunar module onto the surface and NASA reported that the Moon rang like a bell for almost an hour.

Eminently watchable, but for all the wrong reasons.

RATING: 6/10


Mick Ferris

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